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layout- blackdust; joanne
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Wednesday, August 03, 2005

yesterday night i went to de doc with my mom. had urine test to check whether i was pregnant. didnt know that havin long period of menses could mean that im pregnant.

de result: negative.



THANK GOD.
i was fuckin nervous when i got to know of de fact that long periods could be because of pregnancy. well, ive never done it but you'll never know how intimacy can somewhad lead to somewhere close to that. get whad i mean?



well, i for sure got de wrong meanin of whad de doc said yest. this was whad happened.


doc: (received my urine sample from his assistant and stared at his palm which laid de tester. i already told him that i dont think im pregnant) its one nine. if two nine, its positive. one nine, negative.

me: oh okay. (inside my heart: God! Thank God! Oh God.. i was fuckin relieved)

de doc was starin at his palm cause my pee was on his hand! wahahahahhahahhahahahaha.


doc said somethin else bout referrin me to specialist.. yada yada... then we're done. paid 2 bucks for a piece of referal paper and de counsellin.


outside clinic, i askd my mom whether he said one nine or one nine nine (199). this was when i found de sad truth about myself.

mom: i thot he said one line. two lines if positive.


im a blardie sto0pid fucker.


i then recalld seein one pink horizontal line on de tester. two lines (one vertical de other horizontally over de former) if you're positive. and i recalld seein such things in de pharmacy de other time me n hanis went to check on those pregnancy test thingies. we just when to check. nothing happened. im negative.



ahmad has been irritatin me since this morn. no, wait, it was since last night. anyway, i told him i hope he slip and fall and crack his skull later durin his match. he hope that i freeze to death in this library.
bugger.


feel like goin out after scho0l to shop. wanna get new pencilcase since my mom wants my current one. ends at 3.45 today coz no gp coz my hts relative passd away. condolence to her. no malay just now coz cikgu nvr come. had to do some werk though. those in my class not takin accounts can go home durin lunch at 1.3opm. fucks.


eom yet to do.

always alone @ 4:21:00 AM